A Robins' Farewell

Back Again
A few days ago I happened to get a very special treat from Mother Nature.  I was at my daughter's place, sitting outside and enjoying what I now realize was probably summer's last hurrah,  because it was the day before the snow.  Not that we got what Calgary got, though it seemed that different regions got different amounts.  Downtown Edmonton, where my apartment is, the lawns stayed green. The snow melted as it hit the ground but at my daughter's place in the north end of the city the snow covered the ground for a shot while to make the lawn white.  Still, it was too early for snow!!! Anywhere!!!

Anyway, as I sat there, I got the thrill of my life when a flock of about fifteen to twenty robins  arrived in the yard.  They landed in the apricot tree just over the bird bath and took turns taking a bath!!! It was as if they came especially for that specific purpose --- to wash up before their trip south!  I have never seen robins flocking together in large numbers like that, though I used to have many of them come in for a bath at my birdbath when I lived in Manitoba.  This was an unusual treat for me to see them come in like this, as if they just came to bid me farewell.  The next day, we got that early snow!

Were they trying to tell me something????

A Precious Gift

OUT  OF STOCK

I went to a drugstore with a special request today but they told me they could not fill my order. They advertise that they carry everything so that is false advertising, is it not??? I only asked for one single dose of "youth" and they turned me down.  I was extremely disappointed.

 As a Ukrainian kid growing up, I used to listen to a very melodic and beautiful Ukrainian song about a woman that was  going to go on a trip in search of her youthful healthy years.  I can still hear the melody but do not recall all the words. It was sung by a woman who was going to ask  her youthful years to at least "visit her for awhile as a guest"  The next verse is the reply  from her youthful years who tell her they can never come back because she had not cherished either her youth or her good health when she had them, therefore there was "nothing" to come back to now.

Sometimes it seems to me that song is relevant to some of today's youth who waste their youthful good  health on drugs , alcohol, smokes and and other destructive lifestyles.  Too late, they find that there is no turning back after the damage is done.  Just simple ageing is enough of a downgrade for any "body". And that is even without any prior abuse or addition of destructive practices.

Cherish your youth and your health! They are precious! Just ask any senior.

Just Excuses

Apology

Sorry, I have been rather distracted lately and have not been as regular with my blog postings. I am working on getting another book published and it is in the final stages of editing so I am eating, sleeping, living with that book constantly.  I cannot seem to get my mind on much else these days and that is beyond silly.  Guess they call this the "one track mind syndrome" and I have it bad.  It is not as if the book is in "stall motion"! It is just me and I know that!

I do have other very interesting projects on the go. I am just too lazy to get going on them. I know the book is just a poor excuse so shame on me!!!!   You cannot beat time. You have capitalize on every moment you have and make the most of it.    I am just stalling and I have is no decent excuse for  it. Nobody can move my projects for me except me! So bear with me while as I stop making up excuses and get on with living again.

EXCUSES --- BE GONE!!!

In Memory Robin Williams

When Depression Wins

He made us laugh all through his life

It was his glowing passion

Yet behind that silly grin there lurked

That demon of depression.

That depression got the upper hand

And he lost all will to fight

All his problems overwhelmed him

When the darkness shut out light.

With age and fate against him

And gloom would not dispel

When the torrents of bleak anguish

Did forever rise and swell.

He tried to hide his feelings

His  problems and his  pain

But gloom and desperation

Had established their domain

He sought relief where ever

Illusive though it be

For just a glimpse of childlike peace

To end the misery.

But it’s really  not that easy

To camouflage the truth

No matter how hard we try

We can’t recapture youth.

Rest in peace Robin and keep smiling into forever!

Red Sun Phenomenon

A Red Sun in the Heavens

I’ve often watched a sunset

And marvelled at the view

Of clouds of pink and purple

And colors of every hue!

But what I saw last evening

Was a sun that was red! Instead!

I’ve never seen a sun like that

Hang suspended overhead.

Some said it was humidity

Some said it was just heat

Some said it was all that smoke

But I just thought it neat!

For I was watching a red balloon

Hung out there in the sky

An ornament for us to view

Our heavens to beautify.

Amid all our strife and conflicts

We need to sense delight

To know that life’s worth living

And our world can still be bright.

So that red sun last evening

Was a sign from God above

That even when we misbehave

He won’t withhold His love!

Prairie Floods

Flooding Prairies

Those twinkling stars of heaven

That wink and blink and tease

These days just hide in darkness

Determined to displease.

They peer from behind the shadows

Of clouds that make them dimmer

They peek and sneak in secret

With just a scanty glimmer

The clouds just weep in torrents

With tears that will not stop

Raising surging waters

And flooding every crop.

Those raindrops they all gather

In fields and streams and lakes

They have done so  much damage

All earth below them quakes.

They’re flooding every highway

And all valleys in between

In relentless surging rushes

Overflowing each ravine.

How do we save our homes and crops

And end this devastation

If all this rain does not stop soon

We may be asking for flotation

Paying it Forward

SNATCH THE MOMENT

With the weather kind to us, and the sun smiling down on us, and it is indeed difficult to feel anything but grateful for all our blessings.

I watch the news and see people are flooding on the Canadian prairies, burning in the far north and and in the American south, fighting typhoons out in the Philippines and living through horrific wars and strife in other parts of the world.

Here in our peaceful area, I hear our people complaining about oppressing heat! Granted I do not enjoy the 30 above heat either. But I am one of the fortunate ones. I do not have to actually go out and work in this heat.  If I did, I would be complaining too, but luckily, I can hole up in an air-conditioned building and wait it out. So my complaints could easily be classified as "juvenile whining".

Not so for the  problems of the millions of the really unfortunate people who are facing "real" problems. They cannot escape their hardships no matter what they do !!! My heart goes out to them, but that is of no consolation to them! We can only watch their suffering on a TV screen and empathize and sympathize and wish that somehow the world would right itself (but it doesn't!)

So to those of us who can, let's snatch the moment and make something good out of it --- for ourselves, for others out there.  Let's plant our piece of good where we find ground for it. If that stifles one senseless complaint and puts a smile on even one face, then we we have done "our part"!
In this world, that is all we can do. But it is better than contributing to the depression with complaints about things that are of little importance!

Search For Peace

Desperate Search For Peace

Searching for truth in a sea of doubting

Amid the frothy waves of life’s unending trials

I battle fear to maintain confidence

But simple buoyancy evades me still.

Desperately I flounder 

As I sink ever deeper beneath the brine.

The shore of wisdom slips ever further

From sight – and panic now grips the mind

All signs have vanished that had meaning

Survival struggles have lost appeal

It’s just “defeat” that now seems real!

Should I really forego the combat

To maintain serenity, faith and pride?

Is it really worth all this turmoil

This endless strain that just won’t yield?

Would it not be so much simpler

To accept the inevitable and make that the “truth”?

One More Yesterday

Just One More Yesterday

A head too full of “good times”

A mind too full of thought

A heart too full of memories

Of battles so hard fought.

A life so scarred and battered

With pain and sorrow borne

She spends her time remembering

As she sits there so forlorn.

She has nine children living

In this town (not far away)

But they never come to see her

They’re “too busy” they all say.

Still those times were well worth living

So filled with gratification

When her children all adored her

And showed appreciation

Now she’s lonely and forgotten

And she struggles all alone

To overcome depression

‘Bout the “good life” she’s outgrown.

New friends come try to cheer her

(All old friends have passed away)

So she sits with her heart broken

Wishing for “just one more yesterday”.

A Magpie's Lament

A Magpie’s Lament

Somehow I got short-changed

Somehow I was maltreated

When music was distributed

I feel that I was cheated.

The chickadee is just a little bird

Its coat is drab and grey

But it sings a lilting cheery song

As it flits about all day.

The robin only knows one song

But it's music to the ears

It’s a harbinger of happy times

Each time that spring appears

The bluebird has a neat blue coat

And a song that all admire

It sends the hearts of all who hear

To heights their souls aspire.

The whippoorwill just sings at night

Still it fails to aggravate

The folks don’t seem to mind at all

Cause its call they so appreciate

Even crows do not irritate

The folks the way I do

And jays don’t really sing, I know

And pigeons only coo.

But I’m dressed for the party

And I’m sure I sound conceited

But my tuxedo coat does not impress

Cause my squawk  has me defeated! 

Frustration

Scatterbrained

I'm really not a procrastinator, but I have to confess that I am somewhat scatterbrained. (And those squawking magpies outside my window certainly don't help my concentration process at all either!)
But excuses don't cut it, so I better just bite the bullet and put the blame where it belongs - right here at my own feet.  I  have too many projects on the go and cannot do any of them any justice until I prioritize them properly. It all boils down to "put your money where your  mouth is!"

Yes, I write!  But what am I writing???  Well, I finished a novel lately but it is in first draft stage and still requires alot of revision. That is one project. Next project: A friend finished his book and I struggled through it (I can read  normal print for very short periods of time and it was not a big book).  It was a collection of short stories and it triggered  many memories for me.  I enjoyed those stories and was so inspired by the book that I started jotting down some of my own somewhat self-buried adventures - actually some rather self-deprecating confessions, I must admit. (Well I never did claim to be "smart")!

I have also started another novel, a sequel to my already published "Secret In Her Heart". That is project #3. And now that I have my MP3 player working, I would like to listen to some more audio books.

Who said retirement is boring??? I have not learned the meaning of that word! Will I live long enough to complete all the things I'd like to do?  I can only hope!!!

Family Problems For Birds

Even Birds Have Family Problems

This spring a pair of magpies set up their home in a tree in our back yard.  Having been part of this kind of scenario in the past, I was expecting a raucous summer once those eggs hatched, but even I did not expect the piercing mayhem that has been inundating our eardrums for the past three or four weeks - at at all hours of the day and much of the nights as well.  Obviously even magpies have problems with their kids  -  well into their teens and beyond - according to the "bird time frame" that this piercing squawking has has been going on for - like - forever!.


Those young magpies have to have entered their "teens and beyond" by now but they must be worst "problem children" of the  bird kingdom because, surely by now, they should have grown up so that their parents can relax in peace! This has obviously not happened and those young magpies  are like some people's families.  These "bird kids" just refuse to "fly the coop"! Their poor, haggard, parents are still trying to teach them how to fend for themselves and they are apparently failing miserably at that task. It sounds to me  like  those young magpies will never, ever, grow up and will forever be depending on their parents to supply them with all the basic needs of life!

I think this family of magpies is the perfect example of  the "true dysfunctional family" of the  bird world!!!

Anxious Aging

Anxious Aging

She leans heavily on her walker

As she shuffles slowly down the hall

Uttering moans so barely audible

Moving toward an end as yet unclear.

 Searching for peace in a sea of doubting

Amid obscure objectives and dim reflections

Of days so quickly fading from her mind

And she wanders, fearful, anxious

For that certainty she can no longer find.

Youth and vitality have vanished forever.

They slipped right out from her last firm grip

Now from beyond they taunt and tease her

With tormenting visions of yesteryears

When confidence was but a simple concept

 And life was such a breeze to live.

Passing time brings fading images

Of a life that can no longer be

And she ponders this new prospect

Of  “Old Memories” as her destiny.

Vacation Time

I'm Back

I'm  back from a a wonderful  little mini holiday spent  in the tranquility of the beautiful little town of Canmore, Alberta, where Rockies tantalise you with with magnificent vistas of majestic peaks that reach up into the heavens and beautiful clear waters of the rivers and lakes below.  We spent the days sightseeing and enjoying the fresh mountain air and the beautiful scenery and I could not get enough pictures to capture the attraction of the area.  It is really gorgeous country out there and seems to have all the amenities of  a city with the atmosphere of  wilderness beauty and serenity.  Just a couple of hours outside of the bustling city of Calgary, it is the perfect escape into peace and perfect calm. What a wonderful world we live in!!!!

Blessings

Blessings Around Us

I find myself meandering

My heart  heart so full, replete 

As I marvel at the blessings

That God has laid here at my feet.

I leave behind the tribulations

Of  days so filled with care

That trip and trouble daily life

There is no reason to keep them there

I stop, inhale the peace of nature,

It sends my heart to throes of bliss 

I feel the cool of still blue waters, 

Where true presence of God exists.

I hear the hiss of breezes sighing 

They fill my soul with serenity
I sense the aura of nature's splendor
Etch indelibly into memory

I bid farewell to strife and worry
Of days and nights so fraught with fear
There is no reason to be worried
When all God's  blessings are so near !

Technology IS okay!!!

Awe! Success!!!

For those of you who thought I was a lost cause, this is my note of jubilation!  (I may rant and rave and complain alot, but I never give up on a challenge!)
I did get my MP3  player going and I have been enjoying my audio books as I do dishes, and bake my muffins and go for my walk along the river valley promenade.  I love it!  Technology is okay for those who are young at heart --- and those that are too stubborn to give up!  Us old folks may be slow but backing down is harder to do at our age!    

Summer's Revenge

Rehabilitating That Incapacitating Drag

For months I have been deliberating

Cause winter was so aggravating

Its dismal gloom was so exasperating

That warm sunshine I’d been anticipating

Was just nowhere to be found.

Then suddenly temps were graduating

Sun’s rays their heat disseminating

That sunlight was so liberating

That excuses for procrastinating

Had lost their bitter edge.

So the garden needed cultivating

For veggies that we were propagating

But dandelions were proliferating

They actually demanded eradicating

We really did not want them there.

On horticulture we’d been educating

As exotic plants we kept incorporating

Joy and labor we were integrating

Cause Eden’s garden we are recreating

Right in our own back yard.

We sat there planning, contemplating

Those plots that we are allocating

For seeds that we had germinating

In peat flower pots originating

To give them a good start.

Good weather we’re appreciating

The warm days are so invigorating

We find them so intoxicating

All old grievances we’re repudiating

With sighs of sheer delight.

So we sit there prognosticating

Cause we find it so exhilarating

New ideas we’ll be coordinating

Make us really feel like celebrating

Cause it truly is so validating

And we’ve earned this sweet revenge!

Technology Woes

Frustration

Instructions are redundant

If the print is way too small

For I cannot see the letters

I can’t read them at all. 

I don’t understand this gadget

I don’t know how it works

Oh for youthful savvy

 I could really use those perks!

I struggle and I try so hard

I really work to train

But knowledge of these gadgets

I just cannot obtain

So I bug and pester and implore

My kids until they’re blue

They’re convinced that Mom’s a nuisance

With no patience and no clue.

This technology’s moving way too fast

For this brain to comprehend

 For no sooner as I think I got it,

New technology they expend.

Life used to be so simple

When we simply met and talked

There was no frustration

And our brainpower never balked!

Downside of Modern Technology

The Downside of Power

In addition to my frustration with this new technology, I have a bone to pick with companies (Philips, at the moment), who seem to assume that instructions for the operation of their gadgets are unnecessary (redundant?) perhaps.  Seems to me I used to hear the term "user friendly" once upon a time.  I guess the company has now become so big and powerful, that they no longer care about "customer satisfaction".

Because I am visually impaired (not blind)! I cannot read books, (a very important passion of mine.) I  do, however, have one alternative.  I can still access the literary field through audio books which I truly appreciate and thoroughly enjoy. I have downloaded audio books to my computer and listened to them that way but that harnesses me to my computer, and even my laptop  cannot go everywhere  I want to go.  I have also used audio cassettes with my Walkman and those help, but some cassettes are so old that they skip or distort sound, making listening to the book extremely frustrating. A further disadvantage is that cassettes have to be physically picked up and returned to the library (26 blocks away).

Somebody suggested an MP3 player.  I bought one.  But the instruction sheet on it has printing the size of the little toe on my flea's left foot.  If they made that writing any smaller it would totally disappear into the paper!

With an ageing population, Philips could have a lucrative business catering to seniors if they were just a little more savvy with the basics of supply and demand.  Some of us still require instruction sheets    ---  readable ones!

Searching For The Sun

Sunshine Blues

I hate being indoors these days. I've had more than my share of it this winter (it's like that every winter and spring)! I just wish I had a balcony so I can get outdoors into the sunlight without all that terrible MOVING! - special table, chair, umbrella, extension cords, laptop, keyboard, mouse, etc. etc. (I can't stand the laptop keyboard or mousepad, so I bought an external keyboard and mouse). So anyway, I get out there on that public balcony, and I get myself all set up to work. Then either the weather changes or someone comes to visit and I've done all that work to get organized and I accomplish beans! Still I don't want to be imprisoned indoors forever and I will not give up writing. That computer is my lifeline! Guess I just have no hope of winning this battle!

I really do love my apartment but I would so love to have a private, easily accessible, balcony right outside. Unfortunately, few, if any, "Seniors" apartments have balconies. Seems like us old folks are prone to depression and balconies present too easy an access to ending it all, OR, perhaps seniors just forget how to stay safely away from danger. Perhaps the really expensive ones might offer me that option, but my millions have not been printed yet. So I struggle along with the big move each time, and I fail more often than I succeed.

Owning my own home with that wonderful deck was wonderful, but maintaining the place was a killer - much worse than this inconvenient move up to the twelfth floor balcony! 

Them's the breaks, lady! Suck it up!

Armchair Cruising

Getting the most out of your Holiday Buck

Over the years (and there have been many)  I have been fortunate to have tried several ways to enjoy  my "off-time" - travelling, camping, fishing visiting friends/family,  etc. etc. etc... Spring, especially, brings out the wanderlust in me.

Many of my former pursuits are somewhat impractical, improbable, or impossible for me now.  At best, I can still go for some very inadequate facsimiles of each of those most gratifying pastimes, but alas, few can replicate the pleasures that those activities once provided.

I am fortunate, however, to have detailed records of many of the highlights of those most memorable events of those carefree, happy days.  I am now so glad I took the time to record all those very minute details because it is so easy to relive them now.

Luckily, I did quite abit of travelling (one of my foremost passions) in my time, but since I was never rich, I had to stretch every dollar to make it reach the farthest. I loved touring because I got to see much of the world, but it was the cruising that gave me the most value (and comfort) for my money. Each cruise included some sightseeing on land, but it also included  great concerts and entertainment, plus meals and accommodations, (complete with laundry and housekeeping service), and I did not have to pack and unpack my luggage to see a completely different place the next  day!

To me, cruising was worth every  penny! You could be as active or as inactive as you chose to be.  (I liked the "active" part those days!)

BTW my favorite cruise was  on the Sun Viking through the Norwegian Fiords.   What a spectacular cruise that was!!!!!!! With lots of tours on land plus all that scrumptious Norwegian fooood!!!!!

Winter's Demise

Life After Winter

I have been enjoying the demise  of winter lately and to take advantage of it I have forgone the comfortable temperatures of my apartment and gone out walking - down city streets - of course. I guess the city's cement sidewalks are not the most comfortable surfaces to walk on, but for some reason, people get irritated if I walk on their lawns. (There are the city parks , of course, but people look at me funny when I walk in circles.)

Last Monday, it was so nice and warm that I walked for miles and I enjoyed it (till the last few blocks) because the blisters on the soles of my feet hurt so much. Still, I was determined to enjoy that warm weather so I refused to hop a bus and instead, I limped my way home.With all that walking I should have lost at least twenty pounds but all I lost was an earring and that did not even weigh an ounce!  As the pounds, I brought them all back - down to the very last one!

Nonetheless, I am going to take advantage of every opportunity to enjoy that sunshine! Heaven knows I have waited long enough for it. So I have earned it!!! For now, I  simply drained my blisters, applied antiseptic to the area and put on bandages where required and I'm back on the sidewalks again.

Mind you, I got pretty cold yesterday and today as the the wind has not yet been informed that winter is done.  Somebody send a memo. Pleeeease!

Spring Hurrah

Spring’s Hurrah

Winter’s over, the snow has gone

My heart is singing, the battle’s won

I meander down the city street

Till I get blisters on my feet.

But I care little about the pain

I’m just so happy to be out again.

Nature’s finally turned the tide

And opened up the countryside.

Life again is full of bliss

As summers breezes softly kiss

My cheeks still pale from winter’s gloom

But now so eager for summer’s bloom.

So I keep walking, though my feet complain

This new-found freedom is worth the pain.

More “cabin  fever” I can’t abide

Those winter doldrums I just can’t hide

I’m ready now for the soft caress

Of summer’s breezes to assess

And catch the zeal of the sun’s bright rays

To counter that “captive” malaise

So burning blisters won’t keep me home

Cause I’m determined now to roam

And if by chance I have to shed

Some skin that blistered till it bled

T’is but a little price to pay

For the recompense of a lovely day! 

Testing My Patience

Is It Spring Yet

It’s been much warmer lately

And the snow has all but gone

It’s been a long time coming

It’s been a long, hard run.

I haven’t heard the robins yet

But the magpies squawk and shriek

They disturb my early mornings

They really make me freak!

They’ve made their home as usual

In the tree in our courtyard

Their chatter and their squabbles

Show blatant disregard.

For us humans that are trying to sleep

(We really could sleep late)

We’re all just retired old folks

But we can’t enjoy that fate!

Those magpies all wake up at dawn

And they hold such early meetings

They make us all just listen

And don’t offer friendly greetings.

I know it’s just the beginning

And I know they will get bolder

When the hatchlings all start begging

And the young chicks all get older.

I‘m really a nature lover

And my patience is long enduring

But magpies mock that patience

“Nature’s enthusiast” obscuring.

Their sleek shape notwithstanding

Magpies disrupt my serenity

They challenge my persona

And deny my soul amenity 

Easter Wishes and Memories

Happy Easter Everyone!

Once again it it is that joyous time of the year when we celebrate the Resurrection of our Lord.  Like Christmas. this is a very special holiday for people of the Christian faith.  In fact, it is the basis of our faith, and, speaking from a Ukrainian background, it is heaped in rich tradition and pageantry.

How well I remember the great anticipation and preparations which started a week before and culminated with that special church service on Easter Sunday. It was the highlight of the year, especially for us kids.  Sometimes I wonder that the walls of that little country church did not explode from the sheer reverberation of the hymns, sung, not by any professional choir, but by sincere and enthusiastic ordinary (mostly uneducated) farm folk whose simple unpretentious faith gave such meaning to their life and lent them such lofty wings on which to soar.

After the  church service and the traditional blessing of the Easter food baskets, we rushed home to partake of the delectable repast. When  that special feast was finished, all the young kids hurried back to gather around that little church to play games and take turns pulling the long thick rope that rang the huge bell up in the bell tower above us.  That bell could be heard for miles and miles through the countryside.

Easter was three days and while the adults celebrated with friends, neighbors and/or relatives, we kids spent those three days in the churchyard in carefree exuberance, singing, playing games and ringing that huge bell.  Our folks always knew that as long as that bell kept peeling, we were safe and happy and in good hands.

We lost so much when we became "MODERN"!

In A Rut

Ruts and Procrastinations

“Don’t put off till tomorrow

What you can do today

For tomorrow may not ever come,”

I’ve always heard them say.

I’ve been so guilty of that crime

And I feel I must confess

It’s not that I’m so busy

It’s my approach that is a mess.

I’m remorseful and so mortified

My humility is intense 

I need to clear my conscience

And to offer recompense.

I’ve got into a rut somehow

And I have no justification

For this indolence and lethargy

And this lack of concentration.

So I’m whining and complaining

Cause it’s easier to do

It really takes less effort

When your brain just won’t come through!

Armchair Holidays

Armchair Travel

Just came back from a Mediterranean Cruise and a tour of Greece, Turkey, Egypt and Israel --- from  my armchair.  It was a trip I made in 1990, one of several international holidays I had taken when I was younger and alot more spry and adventurous.

 In addition to tons of captioned pictures that occupy a bookshelf of photo albums, I have detailed travel logs of each and every trip.  I had always planned to relive these exciting highlights of my life  and now I truly appreciate all the minute and comprehensive information I included in those logs.

I recall sitting on the edge of the bathtub each evening before I went to to bed, religiously recording the events of the day into my log book  while my roommate slept in her bed beyond the closed door.  I did my writing in the bathroom so as not to disturb her sleep with the lights in the room.  This system worked well for both of us, she got her sleep and I got my travel logs.  Now I appreciate all that effort and sacrifice though at that time I probably did not realize how much time and work I must have been  putting into the task.  (I must have forfeited at least an hour or two of sleep each night after very busy and tiring days of sightseeing as indicated by those logs). Still, now, between the pictures and all that minute information that I included in those notes, those holidays are a real pleasure to relive!

And with almost no effort or inconvenience to expend at all!

Late again

My Computer’s Empty

My computer’s empty, no data inside

But I’m still tryin’ though the power has died.

It seems too early to admit defeat

There’s still a target that I must meet.

It's  much too soon to call it quits

But I must confess to “lazy” fits.

I have been told that it’s “S.A.D.” disease

I’d love to claim it but it’s just a tease.

May as well call it by its proper name

And put it in a “genteel” frame.

 To camouflage it might be unfair

It might just give it a haughty air.

So I’ve just been groping for lame excuses

Some slick manoeuvres or deceptive ruses.

But my stalling tactics have reached an end

All those impediments I must suspend.

I must face the fact that I am failing

Those procrastinations may be curtailing. 

Just vain attempts to distract, disguise

Diminishing abilities to just organise.

I miss that drive and that motivation

That thrust for a goal with no reservation

That focus on purpose with optimistic direction

With keen intent and decisive action.

So no more stalling and no more defences

I’m through with all the false pretences

I’ll put the blame where it should be

And drop that blame squarely on ME!  

Lessons Learned

Goal Accomplished

A goal accomplished, a conquest made

An angst defeated, a vanquish stayed

It took forever, to get it done

To learn this lesson, that was no fun

I’ll make my next choice with more precision

I’ll be more diligent with my decision.

There are some subjects not meant to mine

To just ignore them would be just fine.

I knew I’d bit off, more than I could chew

But once I started, ‘twas  just “follow through”.

So I’m smarter now than I was back then

And I’ll be more careful when I plan

My next project, my next venture

So it will be a “fun” adventure!

Sochi Olympics

Well Earned Success

Finally I can post this.  I had posted it before but then I realized Sochi was still in the limelight with the paralympics - those undauntable  super-achievers  that, in the face of all odds stacked against them, they just refused to roll over and give up!!!!  All participants of all the Sochi games deserve our utmost respect and admiration! 

Below is my original post:

Now that the Sochi Olympics are safely over and all the athletes are home free and in their own beds,  I feel I can finally, and enthusiastically, congratulate all the hard working participants  on  their well-deserved successes, whether they came home with, or without, medals. Their very courage to aspire to compete in those games was worthy of great admiration.  In fact, just going out there to compete in the first place, was an admirable feat, given the much publicized  predictions of eminent catastrophic tragedies awaiting them there.

I don't know if there were others that felt like I did, like I was holding my breath, fearing for their safety.  I was almost afraid to watch the broadcasts lest I should see some traumatic atrocity or disaster that I would have trouble forgetting.  In fact, until everyone was safely home, I dared not talk about it. Finally, I feel I can relax and express my relief.

Now basking in the glow of success for all the athletes and  for Russia itself in averting any possibility of disaster,  I have to offer a congratulatory salute to  Russia, to its security, to the Olympic athletes and to all the people who braved the odds to attend the spectacular event.  

Kudos to you all!!!!!!!!

The Waiting Game

A Holding Pattern

I’m in a holding pattern

Can’t move forth cause I’m holding on

Wishing for a happy ending

Hoping for this phenomenon.

I hold my breath as I wait and wonder

As I watch with baited breath

For that day of peace, serenity

Engaging harmony in silhouette.

Should we ever know the pleasure

Of a loving peaceful world

All its peoples, all its problems

All in unity and wisdom swirled.

But alas, the dream seems futile

As we strive to just maintain

A semblance of a truce untethered

By ideologies held in disdain!

Unbridled Courage of Paralympics

Paralympic Athletes

In the face of all adversities

In the fight against all odds

They just achieve successes

That our whole world applauds.

They dare to push their limits

They just refuse to quit

They have to strive much harder

To failure – they won’t submit.

Their courage and their stamina

To all, are a shining beacon

They conquer every hardship

And never succumb or weaken.

They show us how to master

And to fortify resolve

To strengthen all ambition

That apprehension could dissolve.

But determination and great courage

And fortitude and grit

Bring triumph and validation

And declare them all as “FIT”!

Food For Thought

1   Notable Quotations

I     I copied this from the Ethelbert Echo, a small town newspaper from my old home town in Manitoba. I thought these were neat gems of wisdom and I wanted to share them with you. 

1.   Accept the fact that some days you’re the pigeon, and some days you’re the statue.
2.  Always keep your words soft and sweet, in case you might have to eat them.
3.  Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
4.  Drive carefully.  It is not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.
5.  If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
6.  If you lend somebody $20  and you never see them again, it was probably worth it.
7. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
8. Never put both feet in your mouth because then you won’t have a leg to stand on.
9. When everyone is coming against you, you’re probably in the wrong lane.
10. Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.
11. The really happy person is one enjoys the scenery on a detour.
12. We can learn alot from crayons.  Some are sharp, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all live in the same box.

Fear: A Debilitating Enemy

 Demons  On The March

Seems my (insecurity) demons are on the march again. Ever since I was a kid,  whenever I had a problem that intimidated me, the issue would always manifest itself in bad dreams about savage bull(s) that would be charging after me.  My only means of escape was waking up - often in terror and a cold sweat!

Then somebody told me that the bulls were actually just "symbols" of my fear of some kind of authority, (possibly an "authority figure") that was intimidating me. The only way to rid myself of the bad dreams was to face my fear (tormentor) and thus vanquish those demons.

I had actually fought back (and won) once and the savage beasts  had disappeared from my dreamworld for a number of years.

Well the demons are back!  I know what the issue is that is intimidating me now, but I don't know how to fight back against this one. I know I have some options  but they all require drastic measures and I don't know if I am up to that kind of battle at this stage of my life. I know I can postpone the issue for a while but I cannot do so indefinitely.  One way or another, I have to defeat this demon of fear. I know I have to "bite the bullet",  but my "teeth" are not what they used to be.  I desperately require a major dose of unbridled courage here.

Anyone have any to spare out there?