Today's Dream Today's Action

Dreams to Live By

Many years ago I belonged to Toastmasters.  I joined them with the express purpose of overcoming crippling insecurities. My timidity in front of crowds or strangers was turning ordinary situations into major struggles for me. I knew I needed to overcome that handicap in order to function in regular society.  So I joined Toastmasters  to  try to conquer my irrational fear.

In Toastmasters, we had to write and deliver speeches in front of other members. We had to be take our turn at conducting meetings.  We had to stand up and speak intelligently on any given subject for at least two minutes (without any preparation).  In other words, we had to learn to think on our feet.  It was good - but brutal training for someone with a monumental inferiority complex! I panicked, I stammered, I flubbed,  – badly! I literally wanted to turn and run and just forget about everything. 

But I hate unfinished business - and I hate quitting even more.  So good, bad or otherwise, I determined to complete that course. I did a few contortionist moves, kicked myself in my you-know-what, and did what I thought was impossible.  I completed the course - even made it to the Regional finals with my “Humorous Speech”.  Nothing spectacular, but for me, it was a major conquest!

When I retired, I found myself  stagnating intellectually.  I had no stimulation for my brain and at times I felt almost apprehensive about my mental state.  I'd forget something - or someone's name - and fret about deteriorating mental capacities.  I worried that old age was coming around more quickly than I wanted.  I still had a lot of unfinished business to complete.  I could not afford to get old, senile or ill. 

We all have dreams, hopes, aspirations, passions, pet hobbies, . Me – I like to write – poems, stories, a real novel – perhaps.  Someday – perhaps. 

I now have four books on line.  God willing, there will be more.

So here is the lesson that I want to impart to you – Don’t just flirt with “someday”.         Dream it???  Then DO it!     NOW!!!

Animal Therapy

Animal Magnetism
I was watching the Animal Channel on TV the other day  (one of my favourite channels, the other one being Nat Geo Wild).  The program was called Animal Magnetism.  I am so in agreement with what they were saying there.  The show was about how animals help sick children - and adults - to live a full life, get over a debilitating handicap, or in some cases even cure one.

Growing up and living on a farm most of my life I have always had very close relationships with animals.  (My two  memoir books relate many of our liaisons with the special animals in our lives.) However now I live in an apartment that does not allow us to have pets and that is my only drawback to this place, though I can fully understand their reasoning for that stipulation.  Sometimes it is just easier to prevent a problem than to have to correct it. This kind of apartment building has potential for animal problems. It is just much better to avoid those hassles.

Luckily I do have a partial solution to that problem.  My daughter, who lives here in the city, owns a miniature schnauzer and I kind of have some dibs on dog-love whenever I visit there.  When I was ill this spring, I stayed at Carol's while I convalesced and Bentley was my therapy dog. He was a such a sweetheart, just lay quietly beside me, his soulful eyes almost infusing me with his good health and energy.  Animals truly do have a healing  influence and they just seem to know when you need comfort and peace!

The Value of Research

The Value of Research

I was just reading Kristin Lamb’s blog and in her advice to writers, she was emphasizing the importance of researching the material you are writing about in order to avoid advertising your ignorance of your subject to your readers.  She cited a passage where an author wrote a story that involved guns but because of the author’s ignorance about guns, the author said something that was grossly inaccurate and impossible!   I can relate to Kristen’s frustration with the author ignorance. 

I once was reading a book (by a well known author) who wrote a novel that involved ranching and farming.  In her novel, this author frustrated me not once, not twice, but several times with her ignorance by talking about “castrating cows” and rounding up cattle from a distant mountain pasture in the space of a couple of hours and of shooting bear with a “shotgun” (without even the mention of slug shot). 

 Now as a long-time farmer, I was ready to pitch the book across the room just like Kristen did whenever the “castrating cows” and those expeditious cattle drives were mentioned.  That author obviously had absolutely no knowledge of farming or ranching and gave no consideration to the fact  that someone with a farming or ranching background might read her book and catch her glaringly obvious faux pas.

  

I know that it is difficult to have a working knowledge of every subject but is it not possible to just go generic and just say “castrating cattle or even livestock”?  The specific word “cows” could thus have been avoided and the author’s obvious ignorance camouflaged. The specific time lapse of the cattle drive could also have been simply avoided without detriment to the story.  

Research takes time and effort but sometime it is time well spent and Kristen had a good point there.

Counting Blessings

"Hope Springs Eternal"

I was just talking to a friend of mine who has terminal cancer and I was awed by her courage and her upbeat attitude. Some people should remain in this world forever, simply to maintain sanity in the rest of us. If it is true that the "Good Die Young", it is truly a great misfortune.  We all need a voice of reason to get us through difficult times in our life, but few of us can maintain an upbeat attitude in the face of tragedy or disaster. That takes fortitude of the kind few of us can muster .

I know some of my readers may be struggling with problems not exactly of their own making. Some of those problems are fixable, while others seem totally insurmountable.  However, sometimes a positive and optimistic attitude gives us the where-with-all to keep our heads above water even in the face  of adversity.

To all those struggling with problems today, I wish you the power of my friend's optimistic and positive outlook.   Her approach to tragedy was certainly a lesson in humility to me!  I should be counting my blessings instead of looking for little things to complain about.  Perhaps we all should.

Canadiana

Back Home Again

Well we're back home again after a fabulous 10-day holiday in Newfoundland! Although I have done my share of sightseeing tours pretty well worldwide, this was my first trip to our own east coast.  I found it absolutely fascinating!!! This unique area of our country is unlike any other place I have ever seen.  For us prairie chickens, it would definitely be "cottage country" with its myriad of beautiful lakes, rugged  hills, picturesque valleys and magnificent shorelines.  I was totally mesmerized (and more than a little intimidated) by the steep grades and often rather sharp curves of the roads that wind their way between the almost canyon-like rocky slopes and traverse the the island with such ease.  To me, they seemed like major engineering marvels.

We  spent several days sightseeing, exploring, and even took a boat ride out to see the whales and puffins, something that I truly enjoyed.  Newfoundland folks are so friendly and fun loving and so down-to-earth, so we felt welcome and at home all the time we were there.  They truly made our trip a wonderful and very interesting adventure.  They have so much fascinating history. I even climbed up to the Signal Hill "overlook"!

Nature's Bounty

Cherries Jubilee
There are alot of pies here and what does not go into delectable desserts makes very good wine!  Nature has been very generous this year.  The trees are loaded and as we drive down the back lanes, or out among the fruit farms, there is much to whet your appetite and tease your palette. There are tons of raspberries, sakatoon, cherries, apples, plums, and even apricots to temp us to stop and buy or perhaps at least to taste!

 

LATE!

Always Late
Okay, whoever is stealing time here, please give it back.  I still need it ---- badly!

I just checked my blog and I realized that my good intentions of at least one posting  per week has somehow badly fallen by the wayside.  I think it was Lefty Frizzell that used to sing that song "Always Late". He wanted kisses.  Me, I am more realistic with my expectations, I'm not quite so vain any more.  (That comes naturally with advancing age, you know.)  Still, even at this age, forget about that dog chasing his own tail. I still picture myself desperately hanging on to last few long hairs of the tail of a galloping horse  - and no matter how much I holler "Whow", that horse refuses to stop - or even slow down!!!!

I must be doing something wrong that I cannot catch up with my good intentions.  Stay with me folks.  I'll get there someday - somehow. Winter is coming and the cold will slow us all down.  Am I looking forward to THAT??????!!!!!   (Smarten up, Woman!)









































always Late

Gifts To Appreciate

A Crucial Luxury

I just got off the EPL site (Edmonton Public Library) where I browse for my reading material.  I am so glad to see that  there is a good selection of audio literature available to the people that have vision deficiencies. Just fifteen years ago, I could not fathom the importance of audio books.  Today I cannot fathom life without them!  In my memoir book, I called them a "Crucial Indulgence"!  That is what they are - Crucial - to those of us who have lost the luxury of simply picking up a book and enjoying the message within.  There are many of us that just cannot do that anymore.  Audio books are our lifeline!  When your eyesight is undiminished, you can navigate those tiny cell phones and all the information of that tiny microcomputer that puts the knowledge of the world at your fingertips.  Not so for us that are sight handicapped.

There are many authors that do not do audio books and that is a pity.  From personal experience, I know that I am limited to the rather few authors that do audio books.  I am so grateful that there are a good number of very good authors that do cater to us.  However, I am certain there are many good authors whose books I will never enjoy simply because I cannot read a book. My very own books are only in the printed word so far, though it is still my dream that I can somehow eventually get them onto audio, simply because I I feel I owe it to my similarly afflicted readers.

Therefore I say to those that still have the gift of good eyesight  --- Cherish it!!!   It can be gone tomorrow , no warning, no reason, no reversal!  Believe me, I know.  It happened to me.

Unique Pets

How is This for a Pet?

On nice days, especially in summer, I  like to take a leisurely walk down the promenade overlooking the verdant valley that runs through almost the middle of our city of Edmonton.   Along with the scenic beauty, I enjoy the fresh air and the relative peace and tranquility of an almost country atmosphere as the promenade is off the busy thoroughfare of bustling city traffic that seems muted and distant here. Many people utilize this area to just sit and bask in the sun on one of the countless benches along the promenade, for walking or running for their own personal exercise, or for walking their pets . It is our little piece of Eden within an urban setting and we all love it.

The other day, I had the pleasure of a very unique experience of seeing someone who was walking his pet - a tortoise - an African Desert Tortoise.  It was a most fascinating sight. Absolutely beautiful!  As you can imagine, this pet attracted the attention of just about everyone that happened to be on the promenade that afternoon.  That turtle was at least two feet long and probably about eighteen inches high.  it just ambled along slowly, oblivious to the admiration of his bedazzled fan club. The owner said it was fourteen years old and he had had it since it was tiny enough to fit in the palm of his hand.
 You just never know who you will run into on the Promenade!

On Racism

In The Footsteps Of our Race

I was watching CNN the other day and the topic was about racial prejudices and the plight of blacks and other minority races.  As a Ukrainian growing up in the forties, I can almost empathize with those who are on the receiving end of racial prejudice.  Mind you, I grew up on a farm in a very rural setting and was surrounded by other Ukrainians so I was not subjected to the painful bigotry and racial slurs that my father spoke about.  When he came to Canada, Ukrainians were ostracized and ridiculed. They were the “Bohunks”,  the “Galicians”, and whatever other derogatory term the superior English cared to label the poor peasant immigrants and  that came to Canada at the turn of the century. 

I did not hear those terms myself but I do remember being strapped for saying even a single Ukrainian word while I was on the school grounds.  Use of Ukrainian was cause for corporal punishment. In fact when I started school, because I knew no English, I was relegated to be a total mute for months, until I became proficient in the English language.  When we moved to the village for my grade nine, I was often teased for my Ukrainian accent.  (I still have it, I think, but in today’s multicultural society, I don’t think people notice it - or care anymore.) I do know that I have always felt that I needed to work harder than other folks to overcome the stigma of inferiority. I am still super-sensitive to those jokes and songs that depict Ukrainians as being dim-witted, slovenly, whiskey-swilling drunks in dirty coveralls and babushkas that are the source of “stupid” jokes in more sagacious society.

The way I see it, I don’t think any race, black, white or purple, has a monopoly on smart or stupid, good or bad, neat or slovenly, compassionate or mean, superior or inferior. Every race has its share of the good and the bad.  Every now and then, some person will rise out of the populace and leave some indelible imprint of him/herself that we find  fantastically great and admirable or absolutely terrible and atrocious.  The rest of us are then left to either try to bask in their shadow or to forever try hide from it. Both are difficult.

Would not life be wonderful if each and every one of us was judged solely on our own merits rather than on those of someone else - a single person or a whole race?  

Life Lessons

I just finished  reading - actually LISTENING (due to poor vision, I only do audio books), to Debbie Macomber's  book "God's Guest List" and  I just  realized how my last post " I'm a Wannabe" must look and sound. I am afraid that, in that post, I must sound extremely self-centered and egotistical.  I give no credit to the many "enablers" that have helped me to get to where I now am.  I did not get there under just only my own steam, though I must admit  to a somewhat monomaniacal personality.  My excuse for that is: now that I am retired, I can afford monomania.

 But getting back to to the subject I was talking about.  I realize that to some readers the very title of that book would be a turn-off!  Many people just cringe at the thought of being preached to. They do not wish to hear  bible passages or religious sermons and the like. But  the title  "God's Guest List" in this case is rather misleading.  Although the author does quote bible passages and she does relate the passages to her subject, this book is really not a "religious" book as per say.  The whole book is simply a philosophical approach to life in general.  Yes, it fits a religious theme, but that same approach can fit into an atheist's lifestyle or the lifestyle of any other religion (though I have to confess to ignorance of specifics of  religions other than Christianity).  Still, I am confident that other religions all share the same basic concept of "decency and common sense". What this book promotes is not "Christian religion"!  It advocates a common sense philosophy of life: "Strive to do your best and take advantage of each and every opportunity that presents itself along your path. Cash in on the lessons of your mistakes and the difficulties that you encounter along the way toward the achievement of your goals.

A couple of years ago, I blogged a short poem here entitled "The Value of a Mistake" (October 27, 2011), and that theme fits in with the suggestions that this book advocates.  Religion or philosophy, this book makes total sense for just plain LIVING and getting the most out of  life!  

I'm A Wannabe

I'm a Wannabe

 Since I read my first "book" (The Boxcar Children) so many, many , many years ago, I have dreamed of someday writing a book.  It would be so easy, I thought. I had dozens of ideas floating inside my head and I was convinced they were all fantastic!  (Youthful ignorance and unrealistic optimism, you know.)

From the perspective of youth, almost all things are possible.  Without the sobering influence of past failures and bitter experiences to hamper or reign us in, it is easy to dream big - even unrealistically big.  Which is a good thing.  Youthful optimism takes us onto uncharted pathways that can lead to major breakthroughs in many different fields of endeavour.   Great discoveries and monumental accomplishments have been realized because somebody "dreamed the impossible dream".  Nothing ventured,- nothing gained still holds true, no matter what age.  The optimism of youth is the power behind our countless successful ventures.

If we want something badly enough, we make it happen.  It may not be the ultimate dream of our family, our friends or even the average Joe on the street, but if it is OUR dream, it is worth striving for, worth OUR sacrifices and trials and even bitter disappointments.  Each mistake is a lesson we can capitalize on and utilize to our advantage.  It promotes advancement toward maturity and ultimate wisdom .  We all need to get there. Some get there sooner and others later but success in achieving our dream is everybody's goal.

I may never be someone else's idea of a successful writer, but I have achieved my ultimate goal.  What I aimed for and dreamed about, I have achieved. I still have alot farther to go and I may never really get all the way there, but I am on the road.  To me that is success!  

What are you dreaming about?????  Aim high!

Canada Day Poem (Late)

I am late with this poem.  I wrote it 3 years ago for our Tenant Association July newsletter. When my old computer crashed this spring, I lost several files that I had not backed up onto a memory stick.   I thought I had lost this poem forever but the editor had a copy in her files and kindly retrieved it for me.  It is still July and hopefully, Canada Day is still not totally forgotten. Forgive this less than timely publication. Regardless of the date, it still applies.

What is Freedom?

Freedom is a priceless endowment Canadians take for granted

Without rancour or apology – or gratitude

It’s “our right” our inheritance – our very own treasure

No one may trample it, question it, or disown it

Take it away, disclaim it or even earn it.

It is there, it is ours – free for the taking

Even if we fail to recognize or appreciate it

Even when we challenge, dispute, distort, or abuse it

It remains with us still

Unworthy, ungrateful, though we may be

The ever-loving puppy at our feet

Forever faithful, always patient, all forgiving, never judging

Though we be prone to such disdain.

In Canada, freedom is not an elusive, impossible dream

It is not a sad lament, not even a fantasy

Uttered with apprehension or dread

Lest we be overheard.

Freedom is not a nebulous vision on a misty horizon

A vague and hopeless delusion, unfruitful, barren

A beautiful mirage of an unattainable aspiration

A wistful thought, unrealized, in fear unspoken

A child not ever-yet to be conceived.

What have I done to be so privileged to posses it?

Worthy and deserving of this incalculable liberty?

I was born in Canada!

As for the suffering million poor of this world – there, but for the grace of God, go I!!!

Regaining Perspective

 New Perspectives

I have been feeling rather drained of ideas and energy since my bout with some ill health lately.  Because of it I had started to question my future in the writing field.  There is nothing worse than losing your drive and your hopes and dreams, even if they are merely a hobby and not "your life's work".  That can be a very a  lonely and unproductive state, a state of self-deprivation which is most definitely self-perpetuating.

Hobbies are important. They provide us with purpose,  something to strive for.  We all need that.  I was browsing the Internet and I ran across Kristen Lamb's Blog on  http://warriorwriters.wordpress.com/ I had seen it before but it had never impacted me as strongly as it did this time.  It was as if she was speaking  directly to me, telling me to hang in there, not to give up, to keep pushing ahead against the hopelessness and the lethargy and the indifference.  It made perfect sense and it hit home with tremendous force.

We Ukrainians have a saying that translates "Not wanting to do something is far worse than being UNABLE to do it".  That is so, so true.  Determination to do something can overcome many disabilities.  So I am through bemoaning my fate! Self-pity BEGONE!!!! I am going to complete that novel that has been sitting half-finished on my computer for months.  Look out folks!  It's on its way!!!!  Thanks, Kristen.

Demise of A Computer

 My Computer Lost its Hard Drive 

I used t'be full of ideas,
For subjects to write about
But something wiped my hard drive
I just have lost my clout!

My personal computer
That ran my brain before
Has been cleaned out of memory
It won't compute no more

I sit forlornly at my chair
My whole body in a hush
I try to jiggle that old brain
But it has turned to mush

When I lost my old computer
My old hard drive it did die
Now I just feel so empty
Cause my new hard drive is dry.

I have to to find some software
And reprogram this old brain
To work with Windows Seven
So I can work again.

I thought I could escape it
By avoiding Windows Eight
But all this new technology
Has altered my brain's fate.

I guess I'll have to just adapt
And join this new rat race
Or otherwise I'll keep losing ground
And admit to losing face.

 OH WOE IS ME!!!
 

Walking a Dog

Walking Bentley

He tugs so eagerly on the leash
As he tows me forward so forcefully
He's barely bigger than a rabbit
Yet he's a Clydesdale horse to me.

My dragging gait must be frustrating
He pants and wheezes with all his might
Yet he's relentless as he tows me
Almost choking  in his collar tight.

I know he loves run afield
Or down the street with someone young
But this old grandma just can't do much
The garden gate or what's beyond.

So we struggle hard against each other
He's pulling forth while I pull back
After several blocks of constant pulling
We're both ready for some slack.

This half hour of strenuous exercise
Is most enough to set my day
But Bentley's ready for another
Oh how I'd love to feel that way.

Those carefree days are gone forever
As I amble so laboriously
But Bentley smiles in adoration
Just happy to be towing me.

Back Again

I'm Back

Okay, just in case anyone has missed me in the last 2 or 3 weeks, I am back!  Just had a little set back and am not quite my usual self yet but I'm kicking hard to get there.  Life throws us a few curves sometimes and  and I know I have to roll with the punches but I'm stubborn and I'm not too eager to change.  Still, when there is no other way out, even us oldies have to learn new tricks.

So along with my new computer, my new schedules and my somewhat altered new lifestyle, I am determined to adapt and accept the inevitable.  Outside of being late once in a while, you will still be hearing from me via this blog for as long as I can do it and  for as long as you care to visit my page.  Today I will just touch base as I catch up with all my other "behind schedules."

See you later, alligator.

Ode to a Dear Friend

I lost a dear friend recently and this is my tribute to a very dear soul  who brought a shining star into my life for the few months that I knew her. I used to visit her in the hospital.

Goodbye LouLou My Friend

You tiptoed into my life so gently,

A loving heart, a  feeble breath

A pleasant word, a genuine smile

An eager welcome forthcoming still 

You asked for nothing, demanded  little.

Just above  a whisper, you only begged

“No, don’t go yet, stay abit longer”

Your frail delicate voice entreated

And I could not leave you so forlorn

I hardly felt you pierce my heart

You entered so discreetly as just a peasant "job”,

But you curled into my soul so deeply

And made my heart your “home sweet home”.

Your resilient spirit is my beacon

Your enormous foot prints my guiding path

 So sleep my friend, sweet thy slumber

Away from weary pain, distress

Sleep, for someday I will join you

And we’ll continue from where we left off.

I will sorely miss you

Your Friend

Cassie

Positive Power

 Positivity At Last

Okay after all that complaining about computers! Even I am tired of listening to me.  So I promise!!!  No more!  I am going to count my blessings.  And I do have lots to count.  Sure I have had  a few hiccups in my life, but who hasn't? So out with the negative and in with the positive!!! It has been a very busy June so far and  maybe if the weather  holds out, I may finally get a day to pull a few sneaky weeds from among the veggies on Tuesday.  That should give me a nostalgic thrill and a  high from yesteyear.

As well I am eagerly anticipating a trip to Newfoundland late this summer. That sounds like such a great adventure.  I have never ever been to Newfoundland and I hear it is a fantastic part of Canada,- in the beauty of its spectacular scenery, the unique richness of its heritage and in  the friendliness of its people.

I have made many trips within North America and  worldwide in my forties, fifties and sixties.  Before that, I had to stay home raising kids and farm animals and attending to  other  farm field work. Now I am relegated to basically staying close to home in a one-bedroom apartment or to spend time at my daughter's garden.  I spend my time writing and now it is my books that are travelling all over the world, which is the next best thing, I suppose.  My life has evolved well and and I am pleased with it.

Little did I know, when I was swathing that grain on that Manitoba farm, fantasising about world travel that I would be looking back on those times through the pages of my own books  that are being read  around  the whole world, including Australia, Great Britain, Ukraine and   all of Europe and North America,     How great is the technology of our our world!

 So far, I have not written too much about my travels yet but it is still get on my agenda. God willing, those books will come too. I  enjoyed travelling  and I loved all those countries that I visited.  The places and the people in them, were truly a lasting education.  I am so grateful for the opportunity to experience them all!    

OOOOps

It’s not me, it’s my computer

Modern technology has been a blessing and a curse in my life. It’s like that old adage men use when talking about their wives. “You cannot live without them  but living with them is not the greatest  picnic either."  I think when guys s complain about “the little woman", it’s just that  mucho phrase  they use because all the other mucho men expect them to use it.  Only in extremely rare cases are such comments made in earnest.

 

But I am not joking when I say that I truly have a love/hate relationship with my computer.  I truly cannot live without it but there have truly been several times when I said very unladylike things to it, or about it, and too often, even called it some very unflattering names. Because I am still struggling to maintain a facade of a genteel dignified and proper lady, I will not divulge that terrible secret to you .

Granted my computer is as old as I am “in computer years”. Still I have not abused it (except verbally when necessary).  Otherwise, I have not overworked it by asking it to search the world for minute unimportant information, "just because I can!" or asked it download complicated files or to perform the myriad of tasks that it is supposedly capable of doing simply by the push of a tiny button.  I use my computer for typing text, emails, and occasionally to surf the internet when I require some kind of information.  The relatively few other tasks the I insist on it performing for me probably constitute utilising probably only about 30-40 percent of its total capability.  So what is the problem here?  Why won’t the thing cooperate???? 

I  finally gave up fighting with it.   I bit the bullet and bought a new one.  It wasn’t that I was being cheap.  I just did not want to start learning a new program.  But enough is enough!  I did not even bother to give that old thing a decent burial!  It's behaviour of late did not warrant that kind of respect.  It can draw comfort from the fact that it will not be taking any more verbal abuse from me for the rest of its days. 

 But I am saving that evocative vocabulary for my new computer.  I’m sure, it too, will be requiring a reprimand every so often. It would just be expecting too much from any computer to to have it always behave rationally.  Computers just naturally toss in a hissy fit every now and then. It would be a shame to waste all that colourful terminology.  It took me years to perfect it!!!!!

PROBLEMS!!!!!!

Success ?  Or Failure?
Finally, I am back on line! My 2006 Computer finally gave up the ghost and I have had my son and my granddaughter practically a  living at my place for a whole week trying to resurrect it.  In the end we finally went to a store and I bought a new standalone computer --- and a new web cam as that also died of old age. I'm still not too proficient with the new processes.  This computer tells me that  I need new upgrades for my brain as my old brain is not compatible with my new computer!

 It has been a stressful  month and my eyes are almost in the same shape as my old computer was.  Only problem is I cannot go to a store and buy new eyes!!!! I AM trying to get technical in my old age however. Some stores are actually  really getting rich by capitalizing on my handicap.

In addition to my new computer, I now have a 50 inch TV in my living room, complete with an HDMI cable that lets me hook up my 2-year old laptop to it so I can  read what my laptop computer is telling me by simply reading the huge print on my 50 inch TV screen. As far as the standalone computer, well there is always the ZOOM  IN Feature I  can access on my 26 inch monitor.  Oh the thrills of old age!!!

 Now if I can only upgrade my brain, I may actually get somewhere.  In the meantime. thanks for your patience,  folks!  It's nice to be back again.  If you don't hear from me again, just assume that my hard drive has crashed too.  But wish me luck anyway!

I Heard a Robin Sing

I Heard A Robin Sing

The sun is shining brightly
Its rays are welcome, warm
White clouds are drifting in the sky
With no raindrops falling down
No thunder do I hear today
Though we could use the rain
So I sit and bask in perfect calm
And I hear a robin sing!

The cherry trees are blooming
And the apple, berry, plum,
Their petals keep on floating down
Like confetti  tossed around.
It smells like heaven's come to earth
Boundless blessings on the wing
Life so wonderful and grand
Cause I heard the robin sing!

The roadsides are a blaze of yellow
Amid grasses lush and green
The dandelion is the sovereign here
It's reign is full, supreme
And over and above it all
I hear the robin sing!

The gardener busily mows lawn
In anticipation of some rain
A bunny watches warily
And I hear a robin sing!

The geese are honking overhead
As through the heavens they roam
The sparrows gather moss and twigs
To build somewhere a home
(They've given up on nesting in
A birdhouse not meant for them.)
They scold and squawk and make a fuss
They're too big to fit in
I smile at their frustration
And I hear the robin sing!

All spring is in its glory
Nature's bounty and its whim
I've waited for so long it seems
To hear that robin sing

I've planted all those pansies
Their blooms are smiling now
The sun caresses each new face
As in the breeze they bow
God's beauty's all around me
For I hear the robin sing.

I thrill in the perfect solitude
As I sit, survey, the scene
My wish came true today it seems
Cause I heard a robin sing!

A Summer's Dream

A Summer Dream

I've waited with wistful patience
For summer's warmth and sun and rain
I've searched the heavens for the showers
But clouds just promise rain in vain

If I were out in prairie woodland
Beyond  spongy marshland gates
I'd be listening to the frog songs
Croaking love songs to their mates.

But a city confines nature
To these busy numbered streets
It sets limits on our pleasures
And it rations all our treats.

 I still recall all those spring sounds
That brought pleasures long ago
 So I adjust my expectations
To the delights I now know.

It's been a long cold dreary winter
And we're due for summer's glee.
I've got most of my wishes granted
Now I'm happy and care free!

Dandylion Time

 

  

Yellow Intruders!

Pleasures of Summer

Those dandelions have to go!  This lawn is going to get green when the fertilizer gets put in but that will be after those intruders are eliminated.  I will be collecting alot of sunshine while I send these invaders packing.  These harbingers of spring will soon be replaced by pansies, petunias and other invited smiling beauties. While I am working on this, I will be enjoying the company of a welcome friendly admirer and companion.

 

Admirer and Companion

 

Opportunities Lost

Recording Precious  Memories

I was going through my collection of video tapes the other day and I came across a treasure that becomes more precious with each passing year.  It's an amateur movie I had "commissioned"  of a casual "Family Reunion" of relatives and family back in July of 1996.  It was an impromptu reunion.  My sisters Nellie and Helen and my brother John from  Ontario, had come to visit me  and my brother Mike in Manitoba so we had invited cousins, aunts, and uncles from the surrounding area to join us for a dinner and get-together.

On a stroke of  inspiration, I had asked a friend, who owned a movie camera, to film the event.  He was not a professional photographer, nor did he have the best equipment on the market.  And we hardly had a decent setup for the event.  Our mobile home did not provide enough room for a huge gathering nor did it offer the conveniences for it, but it had a roofed-in deck twelve by twenty feet. There, we set up a couple of long tables and chairs that we had borrowed from the parish hall. Our guests squeezed in as best they could on that crowded deck around those tables piled high with festive food. George, our video man, set up his camera on a tripod in the carport at the far end of deck and set it rolling.  He did not have much choice of where to film from, but he did the best he could with the equipment he had and with the limited space and setup available to him.

We have about  four hours of video of that glorious afternoon.  There are only  a few of us left of that big group of thirty-five-plus that laughed and enjoyed that wonderful afternoon of family camaraderie.  Watching that tape now tears at our heartstrings to watch the antics of that carefree group on that most memorable day.  Little did we know that that silly amateurish movie would immortalize those very dear and unforgettable folks for very appreciative generations for years to come.  That tape was made in VHS. It has now been copied onto a CD.  Already many of those people are gone but their voices and their laughter will remain with us, and our descendants, forever!

Those get-togethers were so precious.  Many of them were at my place.  Why had we not thought of taping them all? Or at least, more of them!  What precious opportunities we missed!
 

Happiness Is

The Power of "Positive"

This is a quote from an email "forward" that I received the other day.  I thought this message was worth repeating.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance

This  almost sounds fatalistic if you wish to take a negative slant on it.  It implies that we must accept the unacceptable, perhaps even grudgingly.  However, I have always said that if we look for the negatives in our life we can always find them, but the same thing can also be said for the positives as well.

For now, we have finally arrived at summer and I, for one, am a happy camper. As soon as I get the chance, I am going down to my daughter's place where I will sit myself down on the lawn with a big sturdy  screwdriver.  I intend to bask in the sunshine as I gleefully dig out each and every dandelion that dares to poke its pretty yellow head out from among the grass roots.  Happiness is where you find it!!!!

A Visit to Yesteryear

Sweet Surrender

I visit a sweet little old lady in a  nursing home.  She is my "Jessica Tandy" (for those of you that have watched the movie "Fried Green Tomatoes"). This adorable lady does not have the kind of dramatic background that Jessica Tandy relates in her story but she is certainly no less captivating or any less lovable.  

She sits  in her padded armchair     

Swaying gently back and forth

Frail, fragile, and pathetic

As soft moans haunt each breath 
She pleads not to be left alone .
Alone in a bleak world.

Alone with her memories

“No, don’t leave yet,” she implores me 

Her feeble voice quivers, weak, 

A poignant mixture of sadness, hope
Forlorn, forgotten, forsaken
Her eyes are pools of aged longing

And her plaintive pleading spears my heart.

“But you look tired, you need to rest Dear.”

I search to find the gentle words
To dispel  rejection, disown indifference 

And I make a promise I aim to keep
“I’ll come back later, when you have rested.

It won’t be long, so rest my dear.”

Slowly, painfully, but with resolve.

She moves her head from side to side

 “Oh I’m just fine, I'll rest later.”

She strains to raise her sagging form.

A valiant effort of ageless endurance

Against the onslaught of weighted years.

Declining health has sapped her vigor

But age has failed to quell a spirit

That just won’t falter or be stilled.

So I sit back down and we reminisce

Of carefree days so long now gone.

Just Whining Again

Woe is Me

Seems like I'm still flying by my shirtsleeves.  I honestly don't know where the week went.  I certainly have little to show for it.  And it is not as if I have been sitting around doing nothing! I have been busy all the time but I suppose, like many other retirees, I fill my days with meaningless chores, trips and exercises that leave little or no imprint.

Shopping trips, visits to the libraries, lunch dates with friends, snooping through malls, often repeated trips to places where I should have accomplished two, three, or more things but did only one and forgot (or was not aware) about the others, account for alot of lost time but very minimal impression and certainly nothing to brag about. (Oh Me, Oh My.)

Hey, but we don't sit there and complain that we're bored!!  Honestly, I have heard that complaint from some retirees.  So I may have to repeat trips, and I may sometimes do useless and meaningless things, but time marches on in my world.  It certainly does not drag!!!

Except winter!!!! Winter has been dragging far, far, far too long.  So I AM COMPLAINING!   LOUDLY!  Who's with me on this??????????

Patience

Holding my breath  

I heard a crow the other day

The geese have honked all day

Seagulls screech all 'round us

But that snow just won't go 'way.

  

The temperatures scream  "Winter"

They refuse to loosen their grip

They force boots onto our cold feet 

And warm longjohns on our hip.  

We can't forgo our parkas

Or the earmuffs for our ears

Though the sun seems warm from above

That icy wind brings tears.

Somewhere a bird calls "spring-time"

But she really has no inkling 

Of the torment she is causing

I don't know what she's thinking

Perhaps I should be patient

But I've been that for so long

It hasn't brought that pleasure

I still pine for the robin's song.

I want to see the green grass

And I know you think I'm lyin'

I'd even welcome all the lowly weeds 

 And that pesky dandelion!

Hi Tech Ignorance

In The Dust
This new technology has literally left me in the dust.  I knew this before, but I was not aware of the full extent of this relentless march. I knew technology had invaded the world of communications big time.  I also was aware of how much technology had improved our lives in the field of labour, travel, trade. food production and distribution and just our lifestyles in general.

However, I was totally taken off guard last week when I was asked to "help at a Bingo".  Because it was volunteering  for the CNIB,  I readily agreed, assuming I would be assisting some blind patrons dab numbers on a paper cards, or at worse, call out numbers or sell them the paper cards.  When I was asked if I had ever played bingo before, I was almost insulted.   I was no dummy!  "Of course. I had!" I saw no need to inform them that it was forty years ago, back in our little village of Ethelbert.  I had supported those fundraisers then both by playing and working at the Bingos.

The coordinators took my confident affirmation to mean I was knowledgeable about modern fundraising Bingos but  I felt brashly self righteous that I would even have to answer such a silly  question.
However I was in for a major revelation and a huge dose of updated education about the modern world! Technology has now invaded bingos!  They are  big business  and have really gone hi-tech.  You have to be a rocket scientist to play bingo these days.  It is no longer a "Dab the number" game. They even have electronic tablets that help you to keep score!

No! I would not have a clue how to play Bingo now.  It far too technical for me and one more time I have been proven to be just a simple "old ignoramus"!
Oh well, I never did like  sitting there waiting for somebody to call a number so I could dab it with a color dabber. That is one bit of education I can live without!

Fond Memories

Memories of Easters Past
We spent a quiet Easter this year, doing nothing spectacular, just enjoying the the familiar serenity of family and home surroundings.  But as I sat here reminiscing tonight and browsing through my travel photo albums, memory took me back to some exciting  Easters of days gone by. One exceptionally memorable Easter season back in the early 1990's stood out in particular. Life held incredible and dramatic adventures back in those youthful years.   I look back on those days with awe and wonder and I marvel that I should have been so fortunate to have experienced so much.

My girlfriend and I had booked a month long vacation in Australia and New Zealand that spring.  We left San Francisco on  Saturday evening before Easter Sunday, making a brief stop in Honolulu and arrived in Auckland, New Zealand on Monday morning.  We lost Easter Sunday somewhere over the equator, I guess.  (Coming back we gained a day, arriving in Frisco, hours before we left Auckland!!!!  It was really weird.)

I was the adventuresome type and when we came to Ayers Rock in Central Australia, I was determined to "Climb the Rock"! Now I am "adventuresome", not "foolhardy"!  It's a mile high very steep climb to the top of Ayers Rock.
BUT I DID CLIMB TO THE TOP ----THE TOP OF CHICKEN ROCK!!!!  
(That's me waving  up there near the top of that second picture.  (I did not wish to show you just how far from the top this lowly section really was.)  Suffice it to say , I climbed to the TOP of something!!!!

Spendour of Our North

A Stunning Revelation

I met a lady on the bus the other day.  She was a friendly sort and we started chatting.  It was a day after a heavy snowfall and roads and streets were a mess as the snowplows had not yet had a chance to clear them.
"Quite a mess" I told her,  "but then it's really no surprise.  This is the northern part of Canada, after all.
She laughed.  "This is nothing, where I come from."
Where do you come from?" I asked,
"I'm from the Northwest Territories," she said with a smile.  I wanted to hear more but our conversation was regretfully cut off when I arrived at my stop and had to get off.

It IS very beautiful country out there.  I have not been to the Territories but we travelled with a camper through the Yukon and Alaska one year and it was definitely an eye opener - an extremely  interesting one to me.  We "southerners (I lived in central Manitoba most of my life, now live here in Edmonton.) and I had always thought that north of the provincial border was bleak and barren and uninteresting.

NOT SO!!!!We did the Yukon/Alaska trip from mid June to mid July and we went as far north as the roads could take us. (the "North Pole site" marker).  It was absolutely one of the most fascinating trips I have ever been on!!! And I have travelled  quite alot - world wide!!! The countryside was ablaze with a kaleidoscope of vibrant colors of every kind of blossom imaginable. Huge mountains flaunt their majesty in spectacular snow-covered peaks, bluish grey rock and deep green forest vegetation that continues down into magnificently breathtaking valleys with the most incredible blue-green lakes with perfect mirror-like reflections of  that the unbelievable splendour in the background behind it.

Oh No! Our north is not barren and bleak.  It condenses its beauty into dramatic seasons of stunning grandeur that is absolutely unforgettable!!!

Stress Therapy

A Perfect Stress Releaver.  Bentley is a miniature Schnauzer  and a very empathatic companion when you just need a friend to commiserate with.  He never lectures you, never tells you to "just smarten up",  never scolds and never, ever, passes  judgement.  He is simply there to listen and be your friend in need.  He is always happy to see you no matter what your mood. No matter how long you have left him alone or neglected him, he never holds any grudges! He will simply lie quietly beside you and before you know it you will have forgotten that you felt bad or had any problems.  He'll have you smiling in no time.

Exasperated

Who Goofed And Set Me Up?

Last month, I ordered some books on line through my editor. Because my editor placed the order, I did not see the tracking numbers of the shipment or an estimated time of arrival of the shipment. That was not a concern for me.  We had done this before and had never encountered problems so I was totally unaware that the shipment was coming early (two weeks early, as a matter of fact).  The delivery guys  are usually courteous  and give me a ball park delivery date when they will be in the area, so I hang around home and wait for them. Since I had no reason to be on the lookout for them, I did not stick close to home and missed them for five trys. The guys DID try to let me know they were on the way.  They had sent me FIVE emails but I did not get them!  Google stuck them into my SPAM file.  I never check my spam file!  That is always  garbage mail!!!

I don't even have an idea what made me look there that Saturday night.  There I discovered FIVE  delivery notice emails dating since the 18th of February that my books had missed delivery to my door and had now finally been left at a post office almost a mile from my home awaiting pickup by me! (There was also an email from my niece who I correspond with regularly. For some odd reason it, too, was in the SPAM folder!! It was about a children's Birthday Party! Nothing flashy!)

I don't have a car  but I do have a little cart that I use for grocery shopping, so very impatiently, I waited till Monday to walk to that post office to pick up the books that should have been delivered to my apartment over two whole weeks ago!  What would have happened if I had not found out about the books being held in the post office.  What if they had shipped them back for non-delivery???

Why did those delivery emails go to the SPAM folder.  Did Google think they were Viagra shipments? Porn Pictures? Illicit drugs?!?!?   WHAT????  The books didn't even contain any explicit sex scenes, for heavens sake!!!!  People actually consider me straight-laced!

I guess I'll have to check my SPAM folder from now on, after all.  Heaven only knows what Google will stick into that folder next!  If I have missed legitimate emails in the past - that's life, I guess.

St. Patrick's Day

Not just for the Irish

I am not a green leprechaun

I’m not Irish through my birth

But I once kissed the Blarney Stone

And I saw St. Paddy’s berth.

So from his lofty perch I say

To folks both far and near

I wish you all God’s blessings

Throughout the coming year.

I wish for all a future  

Of a blissful youthful life

A world of second chances 

To fix your trials and strife.

A world that’s free of sorrow

A world of happy smiles

A world of pleasing biways

For miles and miles and miles.

A world of such perfection

No evil can conceive

No malice or iniquity

May your peaceful world percieve

I’d wish you all the treasures

And happiness galore

And nowhere be there sadness

It's banished forevermore

Happy St. Paddy’s Day to all.

Computer Handicap

Oops, I forgot to eat.

I'm a computer addict - a computer geek - if you will.  However a computer geek implies someone who is extremely knowledgeable about computers and how they work.  That totally eliminates me from the "geek"  category.  I only know what is absolutely necessary to what I am doing at the moment.  Beyond that, I am an ignoramus! When I run against a problem, I have a list of "go-to" people, my son, my daughter, my granddaughter, my niece (my editor), or a distant cousin who's an expert on blogging publications.  In other words, if it was not for these helpers I would be a strictly "text" person.  But that does not keep me off the computer!  I am a stubborn "gook" if nothing else.  I refuse to give up, even to the point of being a pain in other peoples' butts!  I can be a major pest without even trying!

Being retired and living alone in a one-bedroom apartment, I answer to no one.  This allows me the freedom to do as I please.  I get up when I feel like it, (anywhere between 7 and 10 AM). I go to bed when I am dead tired, (anywhere between 9 PM and 4 AM) and I eat when I get good and hungry, (breakfast can be anywhere from 8 AM  and 3 PM) thanks to my dictator, the computer!  Depending on what I start working on, what the computer hooks me with, and how determined I am to lick the problem at hand, I can lose all sense of time and purpose.  (You'd think that with such an erratic eating schedule, I would be skinny as a rail.)  NO SUCH LUCK!!! When I get to that fridge, I devour everything in sight!!!

So am I ready to change my ways???   Not on your life!!!!  I waited 65 years to get to this stage!!! Give it up? You think I'm nuts?   I intend to enjoy every minute of this.  I earned it and I am claiming it!
So go ahead and have fun with your envy!  It's your problem!   I intend to live the way I want to!

Alternative Possibilities

Alternate Possibilities

I have an ongoing problem.  It's been with me for almost fifteen years.  It will never go away. In fact, it will probably get worse with time and there is not a thing I can do to either improve, alter, or halt its progression.  I have learnt to adapt to my situation, but it is a major inconvenience in my life.

My problem is failing eyesight.  Back in '98 I lost sight in my left eye due to an ocular vein occlusion.  Though I regained some sight in it, I still am handicapped to a major degree, particularly for reading or close work.  Most of my friends know this and when they can, they offer helpful suggestions. The other day, a friend gave me a link to a site where I can download free ebooks onto my computer and then enlarge the print to make the print readable with my limited eyesight.  This would give me access to alot more reading material. That sounds wonderful! However it has a major drawback for me.  Between my writing (working on my fifth book), my blogging, my emails and some necessary research sessions, I am already spending way too much time at the computer.  I need to get away from that.  Audio books on cassettes and my walkman CD player are my escape from the computer chair and I utilize them while I do my housework, laundry, cooking, or exercising, thus maximizing the use of all my time while conserving my limited eyesight and giving my eyes a much needed break.

I am so very grateful to our modern technology for offering us alternative possibilities to exploit all our passions with enthusiasm and zeal. How very lucky we are in our retirement to indulge in exciting hobbies while still making productive use of our leisure time! What a boon this would have been to our ancestors!!!


  

A Grand Adventure

A Grand Adventure

As I gaze across a memory

Of idealistic youthful dreams

Those hopes and aspirations

That seemed just lacking schemes

Life's easy from a childish view

From the ignorance of bliss

Accomplishments and visions

Of success seem hard to miss

But days of youth slipped by so fast

And life took a different course

And suddenly the time has gone

Like a torrent of great force.

I’ve had to change perception

And adjust to meet the strife

Directions change with circumstance

And conditions shape a life.

Some goals that I had chosen

Were not easy to attain

The dreams I thought were simple once

I cannot dream again.

But life has not been futile

It’s been shaped by every venture

It’s been a rewarding journey

An altered grand adventure!

My Scale is Broke

My  Scale is Broke

Along with a million others
I decided to lose some weight
To shed those extra inches
Protruding across my waist.

I thought it should be easy
Cause my numbers were still few
But let me tell you straight, folks
Losing is hard to do.

Whether you're fighting with ten or twenty
Or a hundred or two
You're fighting that same darn battle
Against commercial crazy glue!

Those pounds are stuck as solid
They're determined to stay on
Shedding them's much harder
Than it was to put them on.

The times I was distracted
By treats of forbidden pleasure
Have added to my poundage
And doubled up my "measure".

By indulgeing those evil tastebuds
By succumbing to temptation
I have to pay the piper now
And suffer through starvation.

No matter how I try to lose
No matter how I pay
The scale refuses to go down
Those pounds are there to stay.

I only sinned "alittle"
But the pounds did multiply
A few pounds turned to twenty
And I just don't know why!

Enough Already

I Miss Mosquitoes?!?!?

Winter has not been that bad this year, certainly not half as bad as in some areas.  Call it "Global Warming",  call it "Banana Belt Effect", "Ell Ninio", "it's our turn", or just plain "Good Old-fashioned luck"!!!  But we have to admit we did get some nice breaks every now and then.  No really long stretches of unrelenting cold.

It could be worse. I know!!!  But I'm still ready for spring!  Spring - Nothing! I'm greedy!  I want summer! I'm longing for the discomfort of sweltering  90 degree weather. I'm envisioning myself desperately seeking momentary relief in some kind of air-conditioned quarters.  Heavens!  I even miss mosquitoes!!!  I'd even put up with those ubiquitous annoying pests that always manage to dodge my well-aimed slaps and tickle and bite me to distraction. Still I'd put up with them, just for the pleasure of getting out there on the open deck or on the grass with nothing more on than a pair of light pedal pushers and a  flimsy sleeveless top!  I can almost feel the breeze caressing my cheeks as it messes up my hairdo, drying up the sweat beneath it. Wistfully I can almost smell the fragrance of the various blossoms and hear the bees as they buzz among the blooms,  the birds twittering in the treetops above me.   This is the only way I know how to get myself through these long days of semi-isolation. It is my only defence against the monotony of cold winter days that coerce us to hide behind closed windows and doors and warm furnaces.

I want to get outdoors without big boots and bulky coats and sweaters and hoods.  I want to forget about earmuffs, gloves and big warm woolly scarves.  I want to feel light and get that spring back under my feet.  I want to shed all this heavy bulk that I always have to carry around just to keep old man winter from making me shudder and shake as it sucks the very life blood out of my lungs and liver and my kidneys.  Enough already. I'm not into leaving this country for warmer climates! I like Canada! But I want summer! 

Are We There Yet?

Are We There Yet

As our years keep marching on
And we look back at our past
In childlike wonder we question fate
Are we there yet?
Did we fulfill our destiny already?
How much farther can we go?
Do we dare to still aspire

Do we dare to dream ahead?

Could we reach for goals and attain
Some vague purpose as yet unknown?

As you  ponder at the wonder
Of  life's journey and reflect
Do you wonder where you're heading?
And how much farther you can get?

We've all come far from where we started
Traversing life's ever winding curves
Blindly, boldly down uncharted byways
While searching for that illusive dream.
That we just can't forget.

Life's a tour of woes and wishes
Some of them are so far-fetched

But life itself has been a lesson

How life can speed  - or change - or cease
And we wonder, "Are we there yet????"

Time Marches On

Wow!  February already.  Where did the time go? I have always maintained that it took me forever to get to the age of sixteen but since then I seem to be looking for those ever illusive-brakes on this vehicle that is propelling me on  a down-hill slope and TIME just refuses to heed my pleas to slow down.

Why is it that we don't appreciate time until it becomes a scarce commodity?  Now don't get me wrong.  I am retired.  I do not punch a clock, or  report for work for a 9 to 5 job or dash to classes or any such mundane inconveniences that most younger folks are subjected too.  I am supposed to be past that stage.  Frankly speaking, I'm supposed to be a master of my own destiny now.  Still I seem to be on some kind of a schedule that makes free moments difficult to find.  I always seem to have a to-do-list that I just never can make disappear.

However, unlike some people, I have never been bored, which in my mind, would be a fate far worse than having a never-ending to-do-list.  So I may as well not complain.  I am well-off!  (And by that, I do not mean money-rich!) But wouldn't it be awful to have time drag?!? That would be much harder to take than having too many goals ahead of me.  As long as I don't miss out on anything important, life is still an adventure.  So until someone delivers that old order for a 36-hour day, I will just appreciate the fact that I do have prospects for more ventures ahead and that I can at least firmly anticipate shortening my to-do-list!